I am going to disappoint you, but you knew that already.
It’s not that I enjoy disappointing people, but it happens. Often. They come, attracted to my energy, wild and free, but when they see it’s because I’ve rejected the common attitudes around shame, guilt, power and aesthetic, they become terrified.
It’s true, I am a verifiable clown. I have a degree to prove it. People are afraid of clowns. The are afraid of people like me. Surely, it’s because of what we represent. We represent all the truth in the human soul – including acceptance of all the ugly parts we wish to believe we didn’t have and we don’t want to see.
I know, I don’t wear the nose, so perhaps you thought I was mistaken. The truth is alluring though, isn’t it? You want to sneak a peak.
Can you handle the truth? Or will I disappoint you?
I will show you your heart with all it’s anger and fear without shame. It is in my heart and I see no reason to be ashamed of it. It’s like the innocence of a child, unadulterated, unhurt, except with all the knowing of experienced adulthood. It is possible to find our way back to this playful place, this accepting place. You have to be willing to see it, to accept it. You have to be willing to know it might hurt, but say “It’s worth it!”.
This heart knows hurt. You can see it. It is freely shown. It will reflect all the hurts you’ve known.
And that’s what scares you. It is not something you can do with your own heart, yet, and me showing you that mine is free allows you to see that yours is caged. But I know a way to escape, and hopefully, you’re one of the ones we can work towards freeing.